Life Coaching with Sonal

Empowering those who are asking for what they want, those who want to live their dreams, those who believe deep within that life is supposed to be good – and that is you.

Tag: choice (Page 1 of 8)

Feeling relief when in fear

What fear is …..is a feeling I have when I am holding a desire in my conscious attention and a belief that contradicts it in the same moment.

– Abraham-Hicks
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Examples of the above – desiring financial prosperity and believing that it will be difficult for you to get it or desiring a recovery from a particular illness and having a belief that the recovery you desire is rare and difficult. Basically, fear is the negative emotion (or one of the negative emotions) that you feel when you think the thought – “I can’t have what I want.”

The good news is that if you want and if you feel ready to, you can change your beliefs in order to align them with your desires as per your path of least resistance 🙂

You do that by soothing yourself thought by thought, moment by moment, as per your own beautiful, unique and individual pace whenever you feel ready to do so. Initially distracting yourself to topics which are easy for you to appreciate helps in feeling relief more often and then from this place of relief and strength, if one wants and feels ready to, one can soothe oneself on the topic one feels fear on.

Of course, pre-paving on a daily basis helps in not only reducing the frequency of life experiences which have the potential for you to choose fear but it also reduces the intensity of the fear that you feel when in them and hence helps in your regaining your balance easily as compared to before you started pre-paving. Pre-paving means allowing more feel-good moments (i.e. moments in which you are feeling relief, moments in which you are feeling good, moments in which you have a spring in your step, moments in which you have a song in your heart, moments in which you are relaxed, positive emotion feeling moments…) and as you do so predominantly and consistently, you develop vibrational muscles, you develop sea legs, you develop good shock absorbers in life. The action you feel inspired to from this place of strength is so much more than from a place of lack. This is not the only way to react to fear but it is an easy and effective way.

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“When you fear anything, don’t take the next step or do something you’re afraid to do. There are a lot of people that will say: “Oh just push through it, and when you push through it, then you’ll get over being afraid of it.”

And we encourage you to do instead is to come into alignment with what you want first by finding the thoughts that feel good, because fear is there for a reason.

The fear is saying: “there’s resistance within you, that is going to attract some of what you want and some of what you don’t want.

Why not clean it up before you take action?

-Abraham-Hicks

 

Bless you fear, thank you for pointing out that I just blocked something that I want, with a bogus habit of thought, that doesn’t apply and has no relevance to where I am now and where I’m going. THAT’S the nugget we’ve been reaching for, that’s the taking thought beyond which it has been before, that’s why we want you to make peace with your negative emotion, that’s why we want you to understand what it is, that’s why we want you to stop standing in a place being mad at yourself or someone else, feeling negative emotion.

Bless you fear. You’re reminding me that I’ve got some vibrational work to do. You’re not here to remind me that I can’t have what I want, you’re just here to remind me that I’m not ready for what I want yet.

Thank you negative emotion for reminding me of amplifying the thought, that there is something that I keenly want, to which I’m not in the vibrational vicinity of, but I have the ability to close that Gap with a little bit of effort.”

– Abraham-Hicks

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Photo credit – Radu Florin via unsplash.com

The wound has value

 

“The wound is the place where the light enters you.”

– Rumi
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It does not have to be this way but for most people who allow themselves to reconnect in their own, beautiful, unique and individual way with who they are, with the light that is within as well as surrounding them at all times, the clear desire to heal the wound, the strong desire for well-being, the sharp desire for feeling free and happy is the reason to start allowing the reconnection. The wound helps in making this desire clearer, stronger and sharper as compared to before the wound. When one has a strong desire and allows it in one’s physical reality by being a match to it vibrationally, one starts living life empowered and free.

This is the value of the wound. It can help in choosing to allow unconditional happiness more often and when one allows and practices unconditional happiness every day throughout the day, one allows the feeling of empowerment, freedom, worthiness, joy, love and appreciation, predominantly and consistently. We are pure positive energy and we love the moments in which we are feeling the essence of who we are, moments where we are “in the flow” or what athletes call – “being in the zone”. Composers, authors, artists, inventors etc. have long realized that if they are not in the flow, nothing flows.

The wound may be painful but it does have value in helping us grow beyond where we were into a place of true freedom – i.e. freedom from needing conditions to be met before we can be happy. Yes, it is a practice and that is the work for all of us on a daily basis – choosing a better feeling thought on a moment to moment, thought to thought basis (on the topic of the wound, if we feel ready to or by distracting ourselves to any other topic which is easy for us to appreciate in that moment) as per our own beautiful and unique pace, our individual path of least resistance. The journey is eternal.

One of the awesome results of this unconditional happiness is that we allow the law of attraction to match us up with more to be even more happy about as we are already in the same or similar vibration/feeling predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently). Even if one can feel positive emotions 55% of the time every day, one would have managed to allow a substantial change in one’s predominant and consistent vibrations and hence of what one allows to manifest in one’s life. The better it gets, the better it gets.

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The greatest gift you can give to yourself and to anyone else that you would like to be of value to is your own happiness

 

To hold someone as your object of attention while you’re connected to Source Energy, is the greatest gift that anyone could give. When you’re not happy, you don’t have anything to give. And so, what it literally means is be happy, because you cannot give anyone something that you do not feel.”

Excerpted from San Francisco, CA on 8/18/01

Our Love
Esther (Abraham and Jerry)
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It’s only from your place of strength that you are of value in its full potential to yourself and to anyone else that you would want to be of value to. Thinking positive feeling thoughts is worth a shot. You may not be able to feel enthusiastic this red-hot minute but just a little better from where you are on any everyday basis is all it takes for you to start feeling predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently) in a place where you are feeling good (or in its vicinity).

Negative feeling moments have value (even though they may be painful) as they help you become aware of what it is that you “do not want” and therefore, of what it is that “you do want”. Once you have clarity about your desires, you can choose to be a match to what you want by being in the same frequency/ vibration/ feeling of it. You want what you want (whether it is a more nurturing relationship, kind people, happy interactions, more money, adding value, a bigger car, a better house, starting a business venture, a promotion at work, good health etc.) because you believe that you will feel better in the having of it. When you start feeling better now (even though what you want has not manifested yet in your physical reality), you allow the law of attraction to match you up with your desire “easily” and in “its full potential”. That’s when the solutions you want are not just solutions, they are master solutions.

A question can arise here – how do I feel positive when what I am focused on (and makes me feel negative emotion) is so in my face? It’s so much part of my reality that it’s an effort to feel relief. Yes, it may be an effort initially and “distraction” can help a lot here. Distracting yourself to topics which are easy to appreciate for you can help in deactivating the negative thoughts. You don’t even have to feel good all the time (negative emotions have value as they help you grow so they do serve a purpose) but even if you can practice feeling positive emotions 55% of the time on an everyday basis, you would have managed to change your predominant and consistent vibrations substantially and therefore, managed to be a match to your desires. Some suggestions – meditation can help, so can napping (yes 🙂 ), indulging in a hobby can help, speaking with a trustworthy and supportive friend, taking a walk next to nature, a relaxing warm bath – these (or any other way/ process that gives you relief, which makes you feel better, which makes it easy for you to feel good) are all general ways to feel good, practice your vibrational muscle, develop better shock absorbers in life and allow all that you want easily and effectively.
Once you are in a place of feeling good and therefore, in a place of strength predominantly and consistently, chances are high that you will be able to focus on any topic in a way that makes you feel better about it, which gives you relief, which is a match to the solution you desire. For some reaching this place of strength may take less time and for some more time and that is okay. We are human and being kind and gentle with ourselves helps. Knowing that it is an eternal journey helps in feeling ease about one’s beautiful, unique and individual pace.

Positive feeling moments have value as they help you “allow” all that you desire. These feel-good moments are when you are feeling the same emotion (or in its vicinity) as what you believe you will feel when you are living your desire in your physical reality. In this place of appreciation, freedom, joy and empowerment, you are a match to your desires, you are aligned with your desires and as Abraham-Hicks have said – “one who is in alignment is more powerful than a million who are not”, affirming more and more moments of alignment for all those who are asking for what they want.

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Letting go of the struggle

“The less you try to get others to understand your point of view, the clearer your vibration will be and the better you will feel because you’re really asking them to do something that they’re not wired to do.”

– Abraham-Hicks
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It feels nice when others understand you the way you want to be understood but if your happiness depends on other people and their understanding you, you are setting yourself up for frustration. Even the ones who love you and understand you can’t understand you all the time in the way you want to be understood. You may like to consider being happy, no matter what because if you are waiting for the condition to be satisfied (i.e. the condition of their getting you, their understanding you) before you allow yourself to feel positive emotions, you may have a journey which has more struggle than ease. Nothing wrong with that as negative emotion also has value (it helps you give birth to desires and amend earlier desires) but when you can have a journey which is both easy and effective predominantly and consistently, you could consider letting go of the struggle around the topic of other people understanding you.

You don’t let go of your desire to be understood but when you let go of the negative thoughts around this topic, you allow the law of attraction to match you up with people who are more understanding and accepting of others, people who are predominantly and consistently in a place of love and compassion (they are able to extend their understanding and compassion even to those whose actions may not seem justified to them). It’s so interesting that when you decide to not care (not in defiance or any other negative emotion but from a place of having made peace with this topic) and thereby, feel the relief that comes with it, you allow more experiences which make you feel even more of the relief/ ease/ good-feeling place that you are in. You allow more of the people who are a match to your new thoughts/vibrations/feelings on this topic – i.e. who make it easy for you to choose feeling ease. You start allowing the desire (of the kind of life experiences that you want) that life helped inspire within you. As you practice allowing better feeling thoughts, you allow your desire to manifest easily and in its full glory. The easier it gets, the easier it gets.

In all this practice (as per your individual and beautiful pace), if you do meet someone who is not accepting or does not understand you, chances of you choosing a knee-jerk reaction are less as you are practicing your feel-good (or feel better) muscle every day. As you practice predominantly and consistently, due the place of well-being, ease and strength that you are already in (before meeting someone who does not accept or understand you), chances are also high that even if you do choose to have knee-jerk reaction (you are human and it’s of value to be kind and gentle with yourself), you will be able to reconnect to your alignment easily as compared to before you started consciously, predominantly and consistently practicing better feeling thoughts about this topic. You will have better shock absorbers in life.

When you leave others out of the equation (i.e. irrelevant to your focusing on better feeling thoughts), you reconnect to your freedom, to empowerment, to joy, to unconditional alignment. From this place of strength, you are of tremendous value to yourself and to those that you would like to be of value to. At the end of the day, it is a choice – even when it seems that we have no choice (this thought is also something that you choose, either by default or consciously). There is no right or wrong in this. Even though others can agree or disagree with whatever choice you make, it is your own, beautiful, unique and individual journey.

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Your happiness matters

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“The greatest gift you can ever give another person is your own happiness.”

– Abraham-Hicks

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When you are happy (and therefore, in a place of strength), you allow yourself to be of so much more value to yourself and to anyone else you would want to be of value to as compared to when you are in a place of negative emotion.

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Photo credit – pixabay.com via pexels.com

I choose to be happy

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“I’m going to be happy. I’m going to skip. I’m going to be glad. I’m going to smile a lot. I’m going to be easy. I’m going to count my blessings. I’m going to look for reasons to feel good. I’m going to dig up positive things from the past. I’m going to look for positive things where I stand. I’m going to look for positive things in the future. It is my natural state to be a happy person. It’s natural for me to love and to laugh. This is what is most natural for me. I am a happy person!”

– Abraham Hicks

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Affirming feel-good moments throughout the day, every day for everyone 🙂

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Fear or hope?

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“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.”

–  Nelson Mandela

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The vibrational place (in other words, the emotional place) from where you are focused on a particular situation will determine both – the action you feel inspired to offering and also the further life experiences you allow the law of attraction to match you up with. Thoughts which make you feel better, which make you feel relief, which make it easier for you to feel hope are different from thoughts which make you feel doubt or fear or any other negative emotion. You can choose in any moment which thoughts you would like to focus on. You always have a choice.

Problems have value because if there were no problems, we would not seek solutions and therefore, we would not move forward, expand and grow. For the purpose of expansion, problems or questions have value but when one is all warped up in the problem, it’s difficult to see the solution and even if one does find a solution, at best, it is a mediocre one. In order to create as the master creators that we are, its important to be at the periphery of the problem – not so warped up in it that you can’t see the answers you are seeking.

When giving attention to a problem, one can choose to focus on it by being aware of it and then moving one’s focus onto the desire that is being inspired within because of the problem i.e. onto the solution or the answer. As one moves one’s focus to the desire that life has caused to be inspired within, it easier to feel relief and then hope.

Sometimes, it seems difficult to focus on the solution as the problem feels big. The suggestion then is to focus on any other topic which is easy to appreciate and feel good about. This helps in distracting oneself from thinking about the problem. When feeling better predominantly and consistently, chances are high that one will feel ready to focus on the problem one is facing from a solution oriented approach.

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Feeling free and empowered in relationships

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“The purpose of relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.”

― Neale Donald Walsch

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When we look at the other person to buoy us up, we are in trouble. Instead of that, if we take out the time to feel good on our own and then approach the interactions we have in our relationship, we bring the whole of ourselves to the relationship.

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Don’t put up with negative emotion

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If someone says “I don’t want to be with you.”

We’d say, “Okay.” And we’d go find someplace else to be. We are not kidding you, we would not put up with any grief.”

– Abraham

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You can deliberately allow life experiences which others who are looking at your life would call miracles

A photo by Juskteez Vu. unsplash.com/photos/TIrXot28Znc

“There is force in the universe which, if we permit it, will flow through us and produce miraculous results”

– Mahatma Gandhi

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Photo credit – Juskteez Vu via unsplash.com

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