Life Coaching with Sonal

Empowering those who are asking for what they want, those who want to live their dreams, those who believe deep within that life is supposed to be good – and that is you.

Tag: creation

Joy all the way

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“Joy is not the result of getting what you want. It is the way to get what you want. In the deepest sense, joy is what you want.”

– Alan Cohen

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The destination (or manifestation of the specific desire that you have) is important but it’s the fun of the ride that you really want. When the destination becomes more important than the journey to it, the fun reduces. If it was just the destination that you wanted, once you would have reached there, you would not want anything else but you savor your destination for some time and then, you again have another destination (another desire) that you want (and another ride that you start). The journey is eternal. There will always be more and once you know that, you can feel ease with this eternalness and thereby, easily allow more feel-good moments while on the way to what you want. Makes the journey easier and also allows what you want to manifest in its full glory.

What you want is because you believe you will feel better in the having of it – whether it is money, a more loving relationship, health, starting a business, a promotion at work, a bigger car etc. It is that feeling that you are targeting through the specific desire that you have. Why save all the joy only for the last part i.e. when it manifests in your physical reality when you can allow joy not only in the manifestation but also on the way to it? Why limit the joy in your life when you can so easily feel it in the here and now even if what you want hasn’t manifested? You can do so in many ways – meditation, a walk next to nature, indulging in a hobby, speaking with a trustworthy and supportive friend, napping (yes 🙂 ), a warm relaxing bath, a soothing massage, daily lists of appreciation about topics which are easy for you to appreciate, feeling affirmations and visualizations (general or specific, depending on your readiness)…. – depending on the resonance you feel, you can choose one or more than one way out of these (or ways similar to these, ways which make it easy for you to feel better, to feel ease, to have a spring in your step, a song in your heart) to allow yourself to feel positive emotions on a daily basis.

You are pure positive energy. That is why you love feeling positive emotions (of course, moments of negative emotion have value as they facilitate growth and expansion beyond what you have been before but since they are painful, you would want to reduce them and increase the moments in which you are feeling joy, appreciation, love, worthy, free, empowered and other positive emotions…you would want to tip the balance towards positive emotions) and when you realize that you can allow more and more feel-good moments on a daily basis, you may want to consider it. You have the ability to feel positive emotions predominantly and consistently and when you show yourself that you can do so, no matter what – you reconnect to your freedom. As you practice allowing feel-good moments throughout the day everyday in ways which are easy for you, ways which resonate with you depending on where you are – you develop vibrational muscle. It is a practice even for people who feel ecstasy on a rather regular basis. Yes, it gets easier as you go along but it is still a practice (a choice) on a moment to moment basis.

As it gets easier for you, you become good at allowing more and more joyful moments on a daily basis and thereby, you allow the law of attraction to match you up with more life experiences which are in the same or similar frequency i.e. which make you even more joy. The better it gets, the better it gets. You start living life from a place of strength, just the way you intended to live when you decided to come in this time-space-reality.

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Hope can change lives

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“I can begin again”

– Abraham-Hicks

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You never miss the bus. You can always press the restart button to your life whenever you want to and feel ready to do so. There is always hope.

You know it in the core of your being that life is supposed to be good for you. That is why when your life does not go the way you want it to, you don’t like that because you know the off-ness of that physical reality. Every time you feel negative emotion, it’s because you “know” deep within that life is supposed to feel good to you, that you are meant to be happy, that well-being is the order of the day. And guess what? You are right.

All you need to do in those moments of feeling negative emotion is distract yourself to something that is easy for you to appreciate. As you pivot, as you flip from negative feeling thoughts to positive feeling thoughts (in a way which is easy for you from wherever you are vibrationally), you allow yourself to feel relief. As you feel relief predominantly and consistently, you allow the law of attraction to match you up with all that you desire in your physical reality. The law of attraction states – “like attracts like” – i.e. what you are feeling attracts more to feel the same. You want your desires because you believe that when you have what you want, you will feel good (it is that feeling that you are targeting). When you feel positive emotions (even though what you want has not yet manifested in your physical reality), you allow your desires to manifest in your life easily and in their full potential. It’s not that anyone is punishing you for feeling negative emotions (and thereby keeping what you want away from you). Far from it, the universe loves and adores you always (even when you are feeling negative emotion) but when you are feeling negative emotion, your vibration/feelings/frequency is different from the frequency of your desires and therefore, the law of attraction can’t match you up with what you want. We use our understanding of the law of gravity to make our lives easier. We can do the same with our understanding of the law of attraction. Soothing yourself is what turns you in the direction of what you want and what you know in your core is your birthright which is – “life is supposed to be good for you”.

The suggestion is to take small steps towards what you want (you can take quantum leaps but they could be too much to handle so why not just take it easy by taking baby steps as per your readiness and appreciating all-that-is as you allow what you want). There is no right or wrong in this. It’s all as per your readiness. We all have our own beautiful, individual and unique journeys.

By being kind and gentle with yourself, the journey will be so much more easier. You will feel ease when you are kind and gentle with yourself and as you allow ease predominantly and consistently, you will allow the law of attraction to match you up with all that you want in all its glory. You will not be able to totally eliminate moments in which you feel negative emotion as they help you grow by giving birth to new desires or amending your earlier desires so even though they can be painful, they do have value but you will be able to reduce them by allowing more of the positive feeling moments on an everyday basis. You will start living life as you intended it to be – joyful moments, predominantly and consistently and therefore, allowing more and more life experiences which make you even more happy. Extremely empowered place to be in.

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You can always choose to nurture your desires by believing in them

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“If you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.”

– Honore de Balzac

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Simple and profound words.

Desire from a place of belief makes one feel good and desire from a place of doubt makes one feel more negative emotion. This can apply to each stage of your desire turning into the physical reality that will please you further (and that is why you want your desire) but more so at the nascent stage when it has just birthed within you.

Depending on what you are predominantly and consistently feeling (either on one or more topics in life which are important to you), you allow the law of attraction to match you up with things/ experiences/ people of similar vibration (or in the vicinity of those vibrations). If your desire is important to you, it will be of value to consider the emotions you feel when you focus on it.

We use our knowledge of the law of gravity to make our lives easier. We can do the same with the law of attraction too, if we want. We always have a choice.

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You have the power within you

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As I walked past a man with his mobile on the speaker mode the other day, I heard a lady at the other end of the line say to him “I don’t want someone else better than you. I want you better.”

That set me thinking – isn’t that what many of us do? We fall in love with someone and then when we see something which we do not like in that person, we want to change that habit/ trait etc in that person…some of us keep trying our entire lives to change the other person…

What we are feeling in the present moment is far from the feeling we “want” to feel and we believe that by changing the other person, we will feel better ….if we make feeling better conditional, now we are in trouble because the law of attraction states like attracts like – what you are feeling attracts more to feel the same. Not your words, but your feelings are what the law recognizes. Therefore, when you are feeling good predominantly (not always but predominantly and consistently), you attract more to feel even more better about and vice versa.

When you see something in your partner/lover/spouse that you do not want, there is a desire which comes forth from you to see what you want. For example, you see that your partner is at times rude to you and for you being kind is important. You believe that when your partner will be kind to you, you will feel better. The universe answers your desire immediately and now you need to allow it into your physical reality. In order to allow it, you must be feeling either the same or in the vicinity of what you want to feel predominantly but if you keep beating the drum of how rude your partner is, if you keep talking and/or thinking about how bad his/her behavior feels to you and therefore, you keep feeling negative, you are not a match to your desire. The frequency/ feeling/ vibration of your desire (i.e. a kind partner) is different from the frequency you are at in the moment when you are focused negatively. If you are at 106.1 FM and you want to hear 98 FM, you will have to change the dial to 98 FM. While being at 106.1 FM, you cannot hear 98 FM. The frequency of the problem/question is very different from the frequency of the solution/answer.

When you are feeling negative emotions, you have resistance (it feels like such a struggle) and therefore, you do not allow the law of attraction to match you with your desire. Nobody is punishing you (far from it, the universe “always” feels love for you even when you are not a match to your desire) but the way the law operates is “like attract like”. Your desire and where you are vibrationally have to be a match. No body takes what you want away from you and nobody else gets it but you do not get it. You can get what you want, provided, you feel better either by focusing on the positives in your partner or if that is too difficult at the moment for you, you can focus on anything which makes you feel better, which is easy for you to appreciate. As you are feeling the same feeling or are in the vicinity of what your desire feels like, you are moving in the direction of manifesting your desire in your physical reality. As you practice your alignment all day, everyday either your partner will change to be match to your desire or he/she will meet you only on those days that he/she can show behavior which is a match to your vibrations and if he/she cannot change, he/she leaves your experience and another who is a match to your desire takes his/her place.

An important question to answer is – would be you okay if the partner you have cannot change and leaves your life because of your new improved vibrations? What sometimes happens is that we are not ready to be without the person who we are with as of now even if the relationship is not going the way we want….the problem comes when we want him to change without us changing our vibrations…our happiness becomes conditional…. this is choosing the path of most resistance because you are scared that he/she may not be there and you don’t want that even if you are not happy in the relationship…and now you have a journey more harder than what it needs to be…. Therefore, if the answer to the above question is no, then there is some more inner work to be done towards loving yourself.

If the answer to the above question is yes, that means that you are committed to feeling better and now because of your commitment towards yourself, its easier for you to focus on what you want rather than what you do not want.

If instead of getting after another person to change in order to make us feel better, if we could just focus our thoughts in a way (either general or specific) which makes us feel better, then our desires can manifest in our physical reality easily. Sometimes, we may decide to take a temporary or even a permanent break in the relationship as we go about finding our alignment (i.e. feeling better either about one aspect of the relationship or the whole relationship or the topic of relationships altogether). Whether we reconnect to our alignment while in the relationship or when out of it, its important that we do find our alignment and change our vibrations/ feelings on this topic. If we do not raise our vibrations on it, we will find another experience even if we shift to another city or even to another country which makes us feel the same. It would be like a pattern – the situation or setting may change but our feelings would be the same.

The good news is that there is a way out and i.e. by feeling good, no matter what. Isn’t it fantastic that the most easy way (i.e. feeling good by using any excuse) is the most effective way to get what you want? Many people can’t believe that the solution can be so simple. They believe that the solution has to be complex but it is not. Its actually quite simple.

All this reminds me of Abraham’s words below (from the YouTube video titled “Stop expecting others to provide answers for you”) –

“When you look at others to meet your needs, you need to know that they will let you down every time because it’s not their job….

You can’t start at something that is corrupt at its base and ever make it work out without more creativity than it’s worth….

Of course it’s appropriate for you to sift through your buffet and find your preferences. What is screwy is picking up one person and asking them to match your preference rather than put your preferences over in your vibrational reality and allow the Law of attraction to bring it all together and then you go and reap the benefit of what you have sown. That is different. In other words, you of course get to selectively sift, you get to choose with great definition the details of what pleases you and every bit of that is wonderful. Just don’t ask that person now to be all those things. That’s what gets screwy. Let your vibrational escrow percolate and you do your best to give it your undivided attention so that you become a vibrational match to it and then when the law of attraction brings all of it together and brings you because you are a match to it so that there are no bugs to work out.

But what you are describing goes more like this – you sift through the data, you define what you want but you do not work on becoming a match to what you want. So you give your attention to what you have got and in giving your attention to what you have got, you are not a match to what you want and now you say – “I am not disciplined enough to look at what I want, I am looking at what I have got so I guess you need to change to meet all my expectations. If you would be like that, then I would be whole”. That’s what goes screwy.

Don’t ask the people who helped you define what you want to become what you want so that you can have what you want. Instead, let them be the step 1 part of it, use your will power and decision to focus upon what you want and then the universe will bring you what you want. There are so many people going about it in a flawed premise, backwards way where they say – “I would feel better if you would act more like that and I resent that you don’t love me enough to try” and if they could speak it like it is, they would say “hey, its not my job to be everything that you want. It was my job to harass you into clarity about what you want and now that you are clear, can’t you see it that I am not it? Don’t try to make me be it. Focus upon what you want and let that come to you and leave me alone”. And you say “No, I want you to be it. You inspired my desire and if you hadn’t made me grow, I would not be having this problem. So you owe it to me to be what I grew to”.

Here is something really is worth remembering here. When you stand where you are knowing that you want something that hasn’t come about yet and you don’t have the discipline to look in the direction of what you want but instead you are looking at whatever it was that caused you to want it and you are feeling the discord of that lack of focus, there is a very powerful tendency, without even knowing it, to let what you have got to be the catalyst that trains your vibration. So you keep thinking this thought which is different from what you want but you keep thinking the thought so you develop a belief or a chronic pattern of thought which then holds you apart from what you want. So the best way we have of describing that is – lets say that you are interacting with someone who causes you to want “this” and if you could give “ this” that you want your undivided attention then you would stand there and the universe would have to deliver you what you want so that it is really a common thing that someone who was not giving it to you, now gives it to you because you have lined up your vibration and so anything less that what you want is illogical.

So, if for example – you want monogamy. If you are someone who wants monogamy and you are interacting with someone who does not want it or even if it’s the other way round, it doesn’t matter. You want it and they do not and you focus upon what you want and why you want it, the universe has to bring you what you want but if you focus upon on the other person wants which is what you do not want, then without meaning to you train your vibration to what you do not want. Now you cannot get what you want and you keep thinking that it’s the other person’s fault. When the only thing that ever comes to you is what is active in your vibration. This is just another way of saying to you that you got to let everyone else off the hook and you just have to develop your own deliberate pattern of thought by focusing upon what you want. Stop asking other people to be big players in giving you what you want and you be the only player in becoming a match to what you want and then watch how fast the universe delivers to you exactly what you want.

And when that happens, then you are able to live and let live. You let the world be what it individually chooses to be because it can’t hinder you or keep you from what you want. It never could but sometimes it feels like suppose there is Tabasco sauce in the kitchen and you think that it will get into you pie. Others tell you that it will not get in your pie but you say “it will get in my pie. Well, it’s in the kitchen so it can get into my pie. If it weren’t in the kitchen, I would feel a lot more better. So get it out of the kitchen. Oh, now look, it’s in my pie. I told you, I told you that it would get into my pie because it’s in the kitchen. I told you”. And we say “it did not get into your pie because its in the kitchen. It got into your pie because you can’t get your eyes off it. It got into pie because you keep talking about it and you keep activating the vibration of it.”

It really is more irrelevant that you think what the other people in your life want but what is relevant is what you think they want. So if you could just eternally look towards what you want and disregard everything else, the universe would have to give you what you want. And in so many more cases then you would believe from where you currently stand, often you can get exactly what you want from the components which are already present in your life. You do not have to go to a whole new place, you just have to chronically define a whole new vibration.

The relationship between your expectation and what you are seeing is the only thing you ever have the ability to feel around.”
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To know more about the wonderful teachings of Abraham, please visit www.abraham-hicks.com.

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Photo credit – Charlie Foster via unsplash.com

 

Believe

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“One cannot be prepared for something while secretly believing it will not happen.”

– Nelson Mandela

 

Your message to yourself

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“It is interesting that when you believe that something is not good for you, and you do it anyway – What is the message that you are giving yourself?

Either ‘I do not like myself’, which is exactly what we are getting at, it is sort of inflicting self punishment or it is a feeling of unworthiness or a feeling of inadequacy.”

– Abraham

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Each one of us is a beautiful creation of life

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“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”

― Thích Nhất Hạnh

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photo credit – Eli Devaria via unsplash.com

Value of feeling better

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The things that we would be asking ourselves is, “What proportion of my day am I in vibrational harmony with my desires, which means, how much of my day am I happy, glad, eager, fulfilled, satisfied, complimentary? And what percentage of my day am I ornery, irritated, frustrated, or blaming?” And you don’t have to do 100%, you don’t have to do 90%, you don’t have to do 80%. If you could even get around 55% feeling better, than not feeling so good — you’d have significant movement in what begins to happen in your experience.

– Abraham

Excerpted from: San Diego, CA on August 11, 2001
Our Love,Esther (and Abraham and Jerry)

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photo credit – Azrul Aziz via unsplash.com

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