Life Coaching with Sonal

Empowering those who are asking for what they want, those who want to live their dreams, those who believe deep within that life is supposed to be good – and that is you.

Tag: feeling good (Page 3 of 8)

You can’t feel the frequency of a problem and a solution simultaneously



“You just can’t look at things that make you unhappy and be happy.

You have to look in the direction of what you want. And the more you do it, the easier it is. And the easier it is, the more you do it. Until before you know it you are offering a vibration where only well- being flows to you.”

– Abraham


Photo credit – via

I’am going to be happy – no matter what

pexels-laughing child indian - Surajith S.


“We are really advocates of just getting as happy as you can be — which takes care of everything.

Even if you don’t have reason to be happy — make it up. Fantasize it.

Make a decision that you’re going to be happy one way or another — no matter what.

No matter what, I’m going to be happy! If I have to ignore everybody;

if I have to never watch television again;

if I have to never pick up a newspaper again, I’m going to be happy.

If I never have to see that person’s face again, I’m going to be happy.

If I have to see that person’s face, I’m going to find something to see in that person’s face that makes me happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.”

– Abraham Hicks

(the above words by Abraham have been shared from the blog joypassiondesire)


Off course, the “inner work” is to reach a point wherein no matter what your physical reality is, you feel happy but if you are not able to feel happy while in your current physical reality, then are you supposed to tolerate your negative emotions till you wither away?

No! You can get some distance between that which pains you and you. In that time and space that you get, you can sharpen your focus till the time you are able to focus on any topic (even if it was painful to you earlier) and find something in it to feel better about it (it can be but need not be enthusiastically happy…. just feeling better is awesome too while on your path to feeling good about it) i.e. you achieve stability in your good feeling thoughts. As you do that, you reconnect to your invincibility, to your freedom. The power which creates worlds flows through you. In fact, it is you.

Yes, sometimes, because of the way we are focused on a situation, we cannot feel positive emotion. There is nothing wrong in it. We are human and we need to be easy on ourselves. Negative emotion always tells us that we have grown but have not gone ahead with our growth. Whenever we feel upto it, we can change the way we are focused on it and thereby taste true freedom – i.e. free to feel whatever emotion we want to feel irrespective of what is happening around us. Sometimes, choosing to distance oneself from what is painful helps in reaching this place of strength and therefore, is the path of least resistance (it need not be but sometimes, it is and only you know that by the way you feel about it). From this place of strength, we are of value to ourselves and to anyone else we may want to be of value to.


Photo credit – Surajith S via

You are love

Love - Rose petals - Shahista Fatima - pexels

“Nothing is more debilitating than to care about something you can’t do anything about. And you can’t do anything about your adult children. You can want better for them, and maybe even begin to provide something for them, but in the long run, you cannot do anything about someone else’s vibration other than hold them in the best light you can, mentally, and then project that to them. And sometimes, distance makes that much more possible than being up close to them.”

– Abraham


This can apply to any relationship. Sometimes, distance makes it easier for you to reach a point wherein you can feel better about someone. It’s not a guarantee but chances are high.

Why would you want to feel better about someone? Because you are love. You love it when you are feeling love and you do not like it when you are feeling any negative emotion. Negative emotion has value as it is part of the emotional guidance you are born with but it is not who you are and that is why you love it when you are feeling love, joy, appreciation, worthy, empowered, free – because that is who you are. Feeling better for the sheer joy of feeling better.


Photo credit – Shahista Fatima via

Love is the answer

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”

– Oscar Wilde


Photo credit –

Love is the answer

love-heart - Kaboom

“I am convinced that unconditional love is the most powerful known stimulant of the immune system. If I told patients to raise their blood levels of immune globulins or killer T cells, no one would know how. But if I can teach them to love themselves and others fully, the same changes happen automatically. The truth is: love heals.”

Bernie Siegel, M.D.


Bernie Siegel is an American writer and retired pediatric surgeon, who writes on the relationship between the patient and the healing process. He is known for his best-selling book Love, Medicine and Miracles.


Photo credit – Marcus Spike via

Feeling good has tremendous value

laughing woman Kristin Vogt

If you want to uplift others, you can do so “easily” when “you are feeling good”. In fact when you are feeling good, you don’t even have to feel the desire to uplift others. Anyone who has the benefit of laying their eyes on you feels good as it is because you are feeling good. You don’t even have to do anything and if they don’t feel good (chances are less but it can happen at times), it doesn’t matter because you are feeling good in any case.

If you want to be the uplifter that you are, it’s important that in the first place, you feel good, predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently). You are of much more value from a place of strength than from a place of lack to yourself and also to those you may want to be of value to. Your feeling good has tremendous value.


Photo credit – Kristin Vogt via

Honoring yourself

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“When you realize that you’re constantly treating a person a lot better than they treat you, it’s time to make a change.”

– unknown


Photo credit – Demeter Attila via

Being easy about feeling negative emotion

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“The expansion of the Universe and the evolution of all species is dependent on contrast. How could you ever decide what you do want, without living some of what you don’t want? And so, be easy on yourself! Do not try to hold yourself to the impossible standard of only being in a place where everything is exactly as you want it to be. If you could do that you would cease to exist.”

– Abraham


A lot of times, it happens that people who have been doing inner work for quite some time and therefore, have got better at maintaining their inner balance give themselves a hard time when they find themselves feeling negative emotion. It’s like they chide themselves by saying to themselves – “you should know better. You can choose positive emotions. You know the value of positive emotions. Why didn’t you make a better choice in this situation? How can you feel negative emotion when now you know and understand so much better? How can you do this?” The more they judge themselves, the more uncomfortable they feel…the more they scold themselves, the further they get from feeling what they want to feel i.e. feel good till the time they become aware of what they are doing to themselves and stop the negative feeling by distracting themselves to something easy to appreciate. Since they have been doing inner work for quite some time, it’s now easier for them to distract themselves in order to feel relief at this point.

In all of this, it’s important to acknowledge that negative emotion has value and it will always be there. We can reduce feeling pain (as we learn to focus on thoughts in a different way than earlier) but as humans, we will have moments in which we choose to experience negative emotion. Negative emotion helps us create as only when we don’t like something, do we have an awareness of what we like (and hence want to create something beyond where we have been before feeling that negative emotion). So, contrast has value. We are all creators. Yes, some of us may be better at allowing our creation than others but even though one is better, it’s not that one will never feel any negative emotion.

As time goes by and one practices one’s balance everyday throughout the day, it does get easier. Something which may have taken one two years to get over may take two months or two weeks or even two minutes. It’s almost like the edge has been taken off you but it will never be that one will never feel any negative emotion. Why? Because we are all creators and in order to create, we need to see unwanted and therefore, desire the wanted. If we wanted to remain pure positive energy “all the time”, we would not have come in this time space reality as we have.

Yes, we can reduce negative emotion but cannot eliminate it. If we do eliminate it, we would “cease to exist”. Making peace with negative emotion by seeing it’s value plays an important role in being easy on ourselves and enjoying our journey “even more”.


Photo credit – Burak Kostal via

Say no!

Just say no

‘Life is not fair’

‘Why should you have what you want? Do you think you are special?’

‘Life sucks’

‘You need to be open to criticism’

‘You need to face reality. Don’t think that you are too good because you are not.” etc…..

Many of us have heard one or some or all or similar to the above statements as we have grown up. Whenever someone hears a statement like the ones above, he feels negative emotion. That negative emotion is evidence that the statement does not resonate with his inner core . Whenever someone praises us, we feel good and we thrive. That positive emotion is evidence that we agree with the praise, that the praise resonates with our inner core or in other words, we know deep within that we are pure positive energy and when we hear words which point to the essence of who we are, we feel good. That positive emotion is the evidence that we have heard something that we feel resonance with, that we know the “truth” of.

This quote from Abraham below is like a breath of fresh air for someone who has heard statements like the one above.


When your employer or your teacher or your mother or some mentor says to you, “Just deal with it. Just buck up.”

Say: “No!”

“I’m not going to put up with it. I’m not going to put up with my not-feeling-good. I’m not going to tolerate it anymore. I’m not going to acquiesce to less than I have become.”


You can either change the situation which you do not like or you can change the way you look at the situation in order to feel better but if you do neither and keep feeling negative (irritation/frustration/over whelmed/ anger/ hatred/ despair/powerless etc), not only will you keep feeling what you don’t want to feel but you will also walk towards more to feel what you are predominantly and consistently feeling i.e. negative.

The question is would you want that? Don’t you like to feel good? Don’t you like it when you feel love, appreciation, worthy, joy and free? Everything you want is because you believe that you will feel good in having if it. It’s all about you feeling good. You can focus in a way which makes you feel better when you are feeling some negative emotion and when you feel better, you allow the law of attraction to match you up with more to feel even more better. You do have the ability to focus the way you want to. You can change your life experiences if you would want to. You are powerful. The same energy which creates worlds flows through you. You are that energy!


Photo credit – Andy Toolell via


Treasure your sensitivity

pexels-photo-three woman in business suits


“You’ve got to be sensitive to your emotions to change the thought in early stages.”

– Abraham


Do you want to feel better more often? Would you like to feel good predominantly and consistently on an everyday basis?

If you want to change your negative feeling thoughts to positive feeling thoughts, i.e. if you want to feel better more than what you are doing presently, you got to be sensitive to the way you feel. Usually people have been advised, while growing up to be hardened or insensitive to criticism, unfeeling and thick-skinned. I would suggest the opposite i.e. treasure your sensitivity. Why would I do this? I suggest this because only when you are sensitive to the way you are feeling, can you change your negative thoughts to positive ones “in the early stages”. So, is it impossible to change them in the later stages? No, it’s not impossible but changing them in the initial stages is definitely easier. So, the next question which arises is why would you want to change them? You may want to consider changing negative feeling thoughts to positive ones because the law of attraction states – “like attracts like” i.e. what you are “feeling” attracts more to feel the same. It is not punishing you. No one is punishing you. Its just way the law operates. It’s like another universal law – the law of gravity. We use our understanding and knowledge of the law of gravity to make our lives easier. We can do the same with the law of attraction too.

When you hold a hot cup of tea, the sensitivity in your fingers lets you know that it’s hot. Had your fingers not been sensitive, you would have not realized that it’s hot and may have ended up with a painful (and unwanted) situation as far as your hands are concerned. So that sensitivity is important. In the same way, your sensitivity as far as your thoughts go is on the same lines. If you can change irritation to a better feeling thought before it turns into anger and then further to rage, wouldn’t you like it? Even if you do not believe in the law of attraction, I am sure you agree that better feeling thoughts feel good to you. Just for the feeling part of it, you may like to consider changing the negative thought to a better feeling one.

So, the next time, you do not like something, you can either change the situation or better still, change the way you are focused on the situation. Changing the way you are focused on the situation is better because then you are free to feel what you want to feel irrespective of the situation. That is true freedom. The awesome thing about this is that when you are feeling what you want to feel, you allow the law of attraction to match you with experiences which further make it easier for you to feel good. I do however understand that sometimes, the path of least resistance is changing the situation and then whenever you are feeling better (and stronger), you may consider changing the way you feel about that situation esp. if it comes up as a pattern in your life.

What happens when people do not honor their sensitivity even when they are feeling a negative emotion? Is there something wrong? No, it’s just a choice (either a conscious one or an unconscious one). There cannot be a life with “no negative emotion” as we are human and it’s okay to feel them. Having said that, we would want to reduce negative emotion and increase positive emotion in our lives. In fact, all that we want (whether that promotion at work or a more nurturing relationship or a better house or more money or better health etc) is because we believe that we will feel better in the having of it. It’s that feeling that we are targeting. That feeling of “feeling good”. It’s all about feeling good. We would like to have more feel good moments in life, predominantly and consistently. When people feel a negative emotion and do not change it (esp. in the initial stages), it’s very easy for the negative momentum to increase over time. Not only does thinking negative feeling thoughts more often (on a particular topic whenever you think about it or in general in life) make you feel negative emotion but it also makes you have experiences which make you feel even more negative. This is due to the law of attraction as mentioned earlier.

The law of attraction, as noted, above is not punishing you or anyone else (I also do not believe that we are here to learn lessons…I believe that we are here as powerful creators of our life experiences for the purpose of joyous expansion) but that is the way it operates. The beauty of this law is that it is absolutely predictable. You can use your knowledge of it to make your life experiences as you want them to be predominantly and consistently or you can decide to be like a puppet with no control over life. The choice is yours and neither choice is good or bad. They both have their own consequences and one just has to choose. It’s of course much better if the choice is a deliberate one as then one is consciously choosing which increases the chances of one choosing to feel good feeling thoughts rather than negative feeling thoughts (not always but predominantly and consistently) and thereby, being the creator that one intended to be. Life is so much more fun when one is deliberately molding the clay 🙂

And in all this, your emotions are the key. Your sensitivity is part of your guidance system, the manual you were born with. Cherishing it has value 🙂

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