Life Coaching with Sonal

Empowering those who are asking for what they want, those who want to live their dreams, those who believe deep within that life is supposed to be good – and that is you.

Tag: invincible (Page 2 of 6)

You have the freedom to change your focus

woman - Fernando Brasil - unsplash

“The situation is not the reason I feel this way. My focus in the reason I feel this way.”

– Abraham


And I can always choose to change the way I am focused on the situation (whenever I feel ready to do so) in case it does not make me feel good. Why would I want to change? I would because relief feels so darn good.


Photo credit – Fernando Brasil via

You have the power

lady eyes closed- Eli DeFaria - unsplash

“This disease that I have is genetic…. It’s in my genes…. I am doomed!” …

You may have heard statements like this. A study at the university of California shows just the opposite i.e. you can change your genes. You do have the power. This is so empowering!


Healthy lifestyle triggers genetic changes: study

– Will Dunham for

Comprehensive lifestyle changes including a better diet and more exercise can lead not only to a better physique, but also to swift and dramatic changes at the genetic level, U.S. researchers said on Monday.

In a small study, the researchers tracked 30 men with low-risk prostate cancer who decided against conventional medical treatment such as surgery and radiation or hormone therapy.

The men underwent three months of major lifestyle changes, including eating a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, legumes and soy products, moderate exercise such as walking for half an hour a day, and an hour of daily stress management methods such as meditation.

As expected, they lost weight, lowered their blood pressure and saw other health improvements. But the researchers found more profound changes when they compared prostate biopsies taken before and after the lifestyle changes.

After the three months, the men had changes in activity in about 500 genes — including 48 that were turned on and 453 genes that were turned off.

The activity of disease-preventing genes increased while a number of disease-promoting genes, including those involved in prostate cancer and breast cancer, shut down, according to the study published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

The research was led by Dr. Dean Ornish, head of the Preventive Medicine Research Institute in Sausalito, California, and a well-known author advocating lifestyle changes to improve health.

“It’s an exciting finding because so often people say, ‘Oh, it’s all in my genes, what can I do?’ Well, it turns out you may be able to do a lot,” Ornish, who is also affiliated with the University of California, San Francisco, said in a telephone interview.

“‘In just three months, I can change hundreds of my genes simply by changing what I eat and how I live?’ That’s pretty exciting,” Ornish said. “The implications of our study are not limited to men with prostate cancer.”

Ornish said the men avoided conventional medical treatment for prostate cancer for reasons separate from the study. But in making that decision, they allowed the researchers to look at biopsies in people with cancer before and after lifestyle changes.

“It gave us the opportunity to have an ethical reason for doing repeat biopsies in just a three-month period because they needed that anyway to look at their clinical changes (in their prostate cancer),” Ornish said.

(Editing by Julie Steenhuysen and Xavier Briand)


Photo credit – Eli De Faria via


You have the power within you

two people - charlie foster - unsplasj


As I walked past a man with his mobile on the speaker mode the other day, I heard a lady at the other end of the line say to him “I don’t want someone else better than you. I want you better.”

That set me thinking – isn’t that what many of us do? We fall in love with someone and then when we see something which we do not like in that person, we want to change that habit/ trait etc in that person…some of us keep trying our entire lives to change the other person…

What we are feeling in the present moment is far from the feeling we “want” to feel and we believe that by changing the other person, we will feel better ….if we make feeling better conditional, now we are in trouble because the law of attraction states like attracts like – what you are feeling attracts more to feel the same. Not your words, but your feelings are what the law recognizes. Therefore, when you are feeling good predominantly (not always but predominantly and consistently), you attract more to feel even more better about and vice versa.

When you see something in your partner/lover/spouse that you do not want, there is a desire which comes forth from you to see what you want. For example, you see that your partner is at times rude to you and for you being kind is important. You believe that when your partner will be kind to you, you will feel better. The universe answers your desire immediately and now you need to allow it into your physical reality. In order to allow it, you must be feeling either the same or in the vicinity of what you want to feel predominantly but if you keep beating the drum of how rude your partner is, if you keep talking and/or thinking about how bad his/her behavior feels to you and therefore, you keep feeling negative, you are not a match to your desire. The frequency/ feeling/ vibration of your desire (i.e. a kind partner) is different from the frequency you are at in the moment when you are focused negatively. If you are at 106.1 FM and you want to hear 98 FM, you will have to change the dial to 98 FM. While being at 106.1 FM, you cannot hear 98 FM. The frequency of the problem/question is very different from the frequency of the solution/answer.

When you are feeling negative emotions, you have resistance (it feels like such a struggle) and therefore, you do not allow the law of attraction to match you with your desire. Nobody is punishing you (far from it, the universe “always” feels love for you even when you are not a match to your desire) but the way the law operates is “like attract like”. Your desire and where you are vibrationally have to be a match. No body takes what you want away from you and nobody else gets it but you do not get it. You can get what you want, provided, you feel better either by focusing on the positives in your partner or if that is too difficult at the moment for you, you can focus on anything which makes you feel better, which is easy for you to appreciate. As you are feeling the same feeling or are in the vicinity of what your desire feels like, you are moving in the direction of manifesting your desire in your physical reality. As you practice your alignment all day, everyday either your partner will change to be match to your desire or he/she will meet you only on those days that he/she can show behavior which is a match to your vibrations and if he/she cannot change, he/she leaves your experience and another who is a match to your desire takes his/her place.

An important question to answer is – would be you okay if the partner you have cannot change and leaves your life because of your new improved vibrations? What sometimes happens is that we are not ready to be without the person who we are with as of now even if the relationship is not going the way we want….the problem comes when we want him to change without us changing our vibrations…our happiness becomes conditional…. this is choosing the path of most resistance because you are scared that he/she may not be there and you don’t want that even if you are not happy in the relationship…and now you have a journey more harder than what it needs to be…. Therefore, if the answer to the above question is no, then there is some more inner work to be done towards loving yourself.

If the answer to the above question is yes, that means that you are committed to feeling better and now because of your commitment towards yourself, its easier for you to focus on what you want rather than what you do not want.

If instead of getting after another person to change in order to make us feel better, if we could just focus our thoughts in a way (either general or specific) which makes us feel better, then our desires can manifest in our physical reality easily. Sometimes, we may decide to take a temporary or even a permanent break in the relationship as we go about finding our alignment (i.e. feeling better either about one aspect of the relationship or the whole relationship or the topic of relationships altogether). Whether we reconnect to our alignment while in the relationship or when out of it, its important that we do find our alignment and change our vibrations/ feelings on this topic. If we do not raise our vibrations on it, we will find another experience even if we shift to another city or even to another country which makes us feel the same. It would be like a pattern – the situation or setting may change but our feelings would be the same.

The good news is that there is a way out and i.e. by feeling good, no matter what. Isn’t it fantastic that the most easy way (i.e. feeling good by using any excuse) is the most effective way to get what you want? Many people can’t believe that the solution can be so simple. They believe that the solution has to be complex but it is not. Its actually quite simple.

All this reminds me of Abraham’s words below (from the YouTube video titled “Stop expecting others to provide answers for you”) –

“When you look at others to meet your needs, you need to know that they will let you down every time because it’s not their job….

You can’t start at something that is corrupt at its base and ever make it work out without more creativity than it’s worth….

Of course it’s appropriate for you to sift through your buffet and find your preferences. What is screwy is picking up one person and asking them to match your preference rather than put your preferences over in your vibrational reality and allow the Law of attraction to bring it all together and then you go and reap the benefit of what you have sown. That is different. In other words, you of course get to selectively sift, you get to choose with great definition the details of what pleases you and every bit of that is wonderful. Just don’t ask that person now to be all those things. That’s what gets screwy. Let your vibrational escrow percolate and you do your best to give it your undivided attention so that you become a vibrational match to it and then when the law of attraction brings all of it together and brings you because you are a match to it so that there are no bugs to work out.

But what you are describing goes more like this – you sift through the data, you define what you want but you do not work on becoming a match to what you want. So you give your attention to what you have got and in giving your attention to what you have got, you are not a match to what you want and now you say – “I am not disciplined enough to look at what I want, I am looking at what I have got so I guess you need to change to meet all my expectations. If you would be like that, then I would be whole”. That’s what goes screwy.

Don’t ask the people who helped you define what you want to become what you want so that you can have what you want. Instead, let them be the step 1 part of it, use your will power and decision to focus upon what you want and then the universe will bring you what you want. There are so many people going about it in a flawed premise, backwards way where they say – “I would feel better if you would act more like that and I resent that you don’t love me enough to try” and if they could speak it like it is, they would say “hey, its not my job to be everything that you want. It was my job to harass you into clarity about what you want and now that you are clear, can’t you see it that I am not it? Don’t try to make me be it. Focus upon what you want and let that come to you and leave me alone”. And you say “No, I want you to be it. You inspired my desire and if you hadn’t made me grow, I would not be having this problem. So you owe it to me to be what I grew to”.

Here is something really is worth remembering here. When you stand where you are knowing that you want something that hasn’t come about yet and you don’t have the discipline to look in the direction of what you want but instead you are looking at whatever it was that caused you to want it and you are feeling the discord of that lack of focus, there is a very powerful tendency, without even knowing it, to let what you have got to be the catalyst that trains your vibration. So you keep thinking this thought which is different from what you want but you keep thinking the thought so you develop a belief or a chronic pattern of thought which then holds you apart from what you want. So the best way we have of describing that is – lets say that you are interacting with someone who causes you to want “this” and if you could give “ this” that you want your undivided attention then you would stand there and the universe would have to deliver you what you want so that it is really a common thing that someone who was not giving it to you, now gives it to you because you have lined up your vibration and so anything less that what you want is illogical.

So, if for example – you want monogamy. If you are someone who wants monogamy and you are interacting with someone who does not want it or even if it’s the other way round, it doesn’t matter. You want it and they do not and you focus upon what you want and why you want it, the universe has to bring you what you want but if you focus upon on the other person wants which is what you do not want, then without meaning to you train your vibration to what you do not want. Now you cannot get what you want and you keep thinking that it’s the other person’s fault. When the only thing that ever comes to you is what is active in your vibration. This is just another way of saying to you that you got to let everyone else off the hook and you just have to develop your own deliberate pattern of thought by focusing upon what you want. Stop asking other people to be big players in giving you what you want and you be the only player in becoming a match to what you want and then watch how fast the universe delivers to you exactly what you want.

And when that happens, then you are able to live and let live. You let the world be what it individually chooses to be because it can’t hinder you or keep you from what you want. It never could but sometimes it feels like suppose there is Tabasco sauce in the kitchen and you think that it will get into you pie. Others tell you that it will not get in your pie but you say “it will get in my pie. Well, it’s in the kitchen so it can get into my pie. If it weren’t in the kitchen, I would feel a lot more better. So get it out of the kitchen. Oh, now look, it’s in my pie. I told you, I told you that it would get into my pie because it’s in the kitchen. I told you”. And we say “it did not get into your pie because its in the kitchen. It got into your pie because you can’t get your eyes off it. It got into pie because you keep talking about it and you keep activating the vibration of it.”

It really is more irrelevant that you think what the other people in your life want but what is relevant is what you think they want. So if you could just eternally look towards what you want and disregard everything else, the universe would have to give you what you want. And in so many more cases then you would believe from where you currently stand, often you can get exactly what you want from the components which are already present in your life. You do not have to go to a whole new place, you just have to chronically define a whole new vibration.

The relationship between your expectation and what you are seeing is the only thing you ever have the ability to feel around.”

To know more about the wonderful teachings of Abraham, please visit


Photo credit – Charlie Foster via


You hold the key to what you desire


woman with bubbles - Sylvain Reygaerts -unsplash

Nobody is holding what you want away from you. You are just not letting it in whenever you are feeling negative emotion…and when you are feeling good, you are letting it in…it’s as simple as that…


“The reason that so many have come to believe in the unworthiness of human, in the imperfection, in the needing to be judged and straightened out, and in the redemption of humans is because when you want stuff and it’s not happening, you got to fill in the blanks somehow…and most humans fill in those blanks by saying “I am not being blessed because I must have done something wrong, I am not being rewarded because I must be inappropriate in some way”…nothing could be further from what is really going on.

You are not just letting it in because you are feeling unworthy…. you are not just letting it in because you are feeling too angry…. you are not letting it in because you are not joining the source in your powerful now… see, because you are not ever going to ever get it done..…so when your goal is a house, a lover or a car or a pile of money or all of these things that are wonderful…. we wish all of those things for you…but when your goal is all of those things rather than right now, how you feel right now….when your goal is the grid, when your goal is how you feel, when your goal is your point of attraction, when you goal is your rendezvous point, now you are rendezvousing with source, now you are rendezvousing with ideas, now when you are writing a song, clarity comes, now when you are writing a song, brilliant songwriters play with you, now when you are dancing a dance, your ability to dance is there, all the inspiration.

Can you feel how much more productive that powerful now is? That powerful now and now and now and now and now….not just someday…not just later… now..”

– Abraham


Photo credit – Sylvain Reygaerts via

The truth of who you are

“Contrary to popular thinking, being worthy isn’t something you earn, it’s something you recognize.”

– Mike Dooley


You know why you love the feeling of worthiness? You love it because that is who you are. You are worthy, love, joy, free, appreciation and empowered. That is why you love these emotions. You do not “need to” have something in order to be who you are. You are already all of these. You may want many things for the sheer joy of feeling who you are again and again which is great. You will always want more but if that place of wanting is from a place of lack, it will be an arduous journey to what you want. If the place of wanting is from a place of being in touch with who you are and then wanting more, the journey will be easier. As Abraham say, “The perfect creative stance is satisfaction where I am, and eagerness for more.” We are all evolving perfection.

Yes, some people who are disconnected from who they are may want to only consider you worthy if you have certain things but that does not change in any way who you are. There is nothing wrong with you and there is nothing wrong with them. They are just in their moment of disconnection looking at you.

How do you know who you are? You know it by the good feeling you feel when you feel these emotions. Your good feeling tells you the truth of who you are.


Photo credit – via

I’am going to be happy – no matter what

pexels-laughing child indian - Surajith S.


“We are really advocates of just getting as happy as you can be — which takes care of everything.

Even if you don’t have reason to be happy — make it up. Fantasize it.

Make a decision that you’re going to be happy one way or another — no matter what.

No matter what, I’m going to be happy! If I have to ignore everybody;

if I have to never watch television again;

if I have to never pick up a newspaper again, I’m going to be happy.

If I never have to see that person’s face again, I’m going to be happy.

If I have to see that person’s face, I’m going to find something to see in that person’s face that makes me happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.”

– Abraham Hicks

(the above words by Abraham have been shared from the blog joypassiondesire)


Off course, the “inner work” is to reach a point wherein no matter what your physical reality is, you feel happy but if you are not able to feel happy while in your current physical reality, then are you supposed to tolerate your negative emotions till you wither away?

No! You can get some distance between that which pains you and you. In that time and space that you get, you can sharpen your focus till the time you are able to focus on any topic (even if it was painful to you earlier) and find something in it to feel better about it (it can be but need not be enthusiastically happy…. just feeling better is awesome too while on your path to feeling good about it) i.e. you achieve stability in your good feeling thoughts. As you do that, you reconnect to your invincibility, to your freedom. The power which creates worlds flows through you. In fact, it is you.

Yes, sometimes, because of the way we are focused on a situation, we cannot feel positive emotion. There is nothing wrong in it. We are human and we need to be easy on ourselves. Negative emotion always tells us that we have grown but have not gone ahead with our growth. Whenever we feel upto it, we can change the way we are focused on it and thereby taste true freedom – i.e. free to feel whatever emotion we want to feel irrespective of what is happening around us. Sometimes, choosing to distance oneself from what is painful helps in reaching this place of strength and therefore, is the path of least resistance (it need not be but sometimes, it is and only you know that by the way you feel about it). From this place of strength, we are of value to ourselves and to anyone else we may want to be of value to.


Photo credit – Surajith S via

You are love

Love - Rose petals - Shahista Fatima - pexels

“Nothing is more debilitating than to care about something you can’t do anything about. And you can’t do anything about your adult children. You can want better for them, and maybe even begin to provide something for them, but in the long run, you cannot do anything about someone else’s vibration other than hold them in the best light you can, mentally, and then project that to them. And sometimes, distance makes that much more possible than being up close to them.”

– Abraham


This can apply to any relationship. Sometimes, distance makes it easier for you to reach a point wherein you can feel better about someone. It’s not a guarantee but chances are high.

Why would you want to feel better about someone? Because you are love. You love it when you are feeling love and you do not like it when you are feeling any negative emotion. Negative emotion has value as it is part of the emotional guidance you are born with but it is not who you are and that is why you love it when you are feeling love, joy, appreciation, worthy, empowered, free – because that is who you are. Feeling better for the sheer joy of feeling better.


Photo credit – Shahista Fatima via


woman with arms spread - Fernando Brasil -

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”

– Carl Gustav Jung


Photo credit – Fernando Brasil via

The energy which creates worlds is flowing within you



“I never thought anything about age. I believed sincerely and still do, that there’s nothing I cannot do. I believe that all the power in the universe is right inside me.”

– Tao Porchon-Lynch


Tao Porchon-Lynch, master Yoga teacher, 97 years young, synthesizes the most positive aspects of Indian, European and American thought.


Photo credit -

Love is the answer

love-heart - Kaboom

“I am convinced that unconditional love is the most powerful known stimulant of the immune system. If I told patients to raise their blood levels of immune globulins or killer T cells, no one would know how. But if I can teach them to love themselves and others fully, the same changes happen automatically. The truth is: love heals.”

Bernie Siegel, M.D.


Bernie Siegel is an American writer and retired pediatric surgeon, who writes on the relationship between the patient and the healing process. He is known for his best-selling book Love, Medicine and Miracles.


Photo credit – Marcus Spike via

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