Life Coaching with Sonal

Empowering those who are asking for what they want, those who want to live their dreams, those who believe deep within that life is supposed to be good – and that is you.

Tag: strength (Page 1 of 2)

From my heart, for your heart

During this tender time that we all are experiencing, I feel that vibrationally, at an energy level, we are so much more aware, aligned and in sync than ever before and therefore, so much more connected to each other than ever before – as a community, as humanity.

Sending love and thoughts of hope, ease, comfort, faith, compassion, strength, resilience and well-being for everyone – the medical fraternity, those working tirelessly to find a solution, those most impacted, those who do not have access to resources, those being kind and compassionate to themselves and to others, to us all.

Forgiveness, ease and freedom

“Today I decided to forgive you. Not because you apologized, or because you acknowledged the pain that you caused me, but because my soul deserves peace.”

– Najwa Zebian


What is forgiveness? Forgiveness, in very simple words, is when you decide to let go of the pain and be the joyful, appreciative and loving person that you actually are. When you forgive, you are not saying that the act committed (or the series of acts committed) are justified or okay. They never will be.

When you forgive, you are letting go of all the anger, the pain and the resentment and thereby, allowing in the joy, the appreciation, the love that you so want to feel. Don’t you like it when you are in joy? Don’t you feel good when you find yourself appreciating things/people/places/experiences? Don’t you find love such a wonderful feeling? The answer to these questions is yes and you do that because that’s who you are, that’s who your inner self is. When you hold yourself in anger (however justified it may be), you are far away from your true inner self and you feel pain in that separation. You don’t like it but it’s so difficult to let go as the resentment feels so justified.

Yes, forgiveness can be difficult but living in anger, resentment, pain, hatred every time you think about it – isn’t that difficult too?

You may decide to continue the relationship or continue the relationship and also reach out for help or you may decide to either temporarily or permanently end the relationship and firstly get to a place where you feel safe … – whatever you choose as per what gives you the most relief (i.e. as per your path of least resistance which only you know), what is more important is what you feel within.

Forgiveness means letting go of the pain, the anger and the resentment in your heart and feeling the relief that you so much want to feel. Forgiveness means looking at the situation, whenever you feel ready to, in a way which makes you feel relief and therefore, closer to the ease you want to feel. Forgiveness is your gift to yourself.

“Forgive because you deserve it.”

― Abraham-Hicks


Forgiveness can come up many times in our unique and beautiful journeys as the day-to-day experiences that make the tapestry of our lives are of great significance to us. Through the life coaching work that I do with my clients and what I see around makes me feel that it can be of help to remind ourselves of its value.

In the situations that one feels the desire to think about it, usually it does not happen in one swoop. It can be felt in one go by some people in some situations but generally it’s a process based on one’s path of least resistance. Initiating forgiveness by keeping one’s path of least resistance in mind makes it easier.

Affirming, for everyone, more and more moments of letting go of the resistance and letting in of relief, of ease, of feeling better than earlier. I feel the year – “2020” signifies something on the lines of a version “2.0” of ourselves for many of us who are willing and ready to start the process of letting go of the struggle, the resistance, the pain and letting in of the relief, the fresh air, the song in our hearts….letting in of the feeling of being empowered and free.

Affirming for everyone a beautiful 2020 filled with moments of ease, peace and joy!

You do have the power

African American lady smiling - Matthew Smith - unsplash

“She made broken look beautiful and strong look invincible. She walked with the universe on her shoulders and made it look like a pair of wings.”

– Ariana Dancu

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I feel that this is not just for women but for everyone else too

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Photo credit – Matthew Smith via unsplash.com

I’am going to be happy – no matter what

pexels-laughing child indian - Surajith S.

 

“We are really advocates of just getting as happy as you can be — which takes care of everything.

Even if you don’t have reason to be happy — make it up. Fantasize it.

Make a decision that you’re going to be happy one way or another — no matter what.

No matter what, I’m going to be happy! If I have to ignore everybody;

if I have to never watch television again;

if I have to never pick up a newspaper again, I’m going to be happy.

If I never have to see that person’s face again, I’m going to be happy.

If I have to see that person’s face, I’m going to find something to see in that person’s face that makes me happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.

I’m going to be happy.”

– Abraham Hicks

(the above words by Abraham have been shared from the blog joypassiondesire)

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Off course, the “inner work” is to reach a point wherein no matter what your physical reality is, you feel happy but if you are not able to feel happy while in your current physical reality, then are you supposed to tolerate your negative emotions till you wither away?

No! You can get some distance between that which pains you and you. In that time and space that you get, you can sharpen your focus till the time you are able to focus on any topic (even if it was painful to you earlier) and find something in it to feel better about it (it can be but need not be enthusiastically happy…. just feeling better is awesome too while on your path to feeling good about it) i.e. you achieve stability in your good feeling thoughts. As you do that, you reconnect to your invincibility, to your freedom. The power which creates worlds flows through you. In fact, it is you.

Yes, sometimes, because of the way we are focused on a situation, we cannot feel positive emotion. There is nothing wrong in it. We are human and we need to be easy on ourselves. Negative emotion always tells us that we have grown but have not gone ahead with our growth. Whenever we feel upto it, we can change the way we are focused on it and thereby taste true freedom – i.e. free to feel whatever emotion we want to feel irrespective of what is happening around us. Sometimes, choosing to distance oneself from what is painful helps in reaching this place of strength and therefore, is the path of least resistance (it need not be but sometimes, it is and only you know that by the way you feel about it). From this place of strength, we are of value to ourselves and to anyone else we may want to be of value to.

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Photo credit – Surajith S via pexels.com

Feeling good has tremendous value

laughing woman pexels.com Kristin Vogt

If you want to uplift others, you can do so “easily” when “you are feeling good”. In fact when you are feeling good, you don’t even have to feel the desire to uplift others. Anyone who has the benefit of laying their eyes on you feels good as it is because you are feeling good. You don’t even have to do anything and if they don’t feel good (chances are less but it can happen at times), it doesn’t matter because you are feeling good in any case.

If you want to be the uplifter that you are, it’s important that in the first place, you feel good, predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently). You are of much more value from a place of strength than from a place of lack to yourself and also to those you may want to be of value to. Your feeling good has tremendous value.

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Photo credit – Kristin Vogt via pexels.com

True freedom

pexels- woman happy jumping

“Stop worrying about what other people think. They’re probably too busy worrying about what other people think, too! 🙂

– Cheryl Richardson

 

Believe in yourself

bird - Vincent Van Zalinge

 

“A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on it’s own wings. Always believe in yourself.”

– unknown

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Photo credit – Vincent Van Zalinge via unsplash.com

Reconnecting to the strength within

 

woman arms raised looking at the sun - Catherine McMahon

“In other words, nothing is more annoying than to see someone happy when you’re not. Nothing is more annoying than to see someone living the life you want to live when you are not living it, and , even worse, crowing about it: “Oh, let me tell you how good my life.” “Let’s not go there”, you say.

We don’t want you to compare yourself with anybody else. We just want you to have a comparative awareness of whether this thought that you’re thinking right now is upstream or downstream. And do you know why? Because this thought that you are thinking right now is your point of attraction. This is the thought that you are thinking right now that your life is becoming an indicator of.”

– Abraham
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Sometimes there is a phase or a series of phases in our lives (not in everyone’s as a rule but in many people’s lives) when things are not going the way we want them to, when we are feeling low and when our reality is far from what we want.

At that time, when we look around and find friends/colleagues/family members/ strangers etc happy with their lives, we are angry. This is not because we don’t want good for them but because we are not feeling good and we suddenly become aware that there are others who are enjoying what we so much want for ourselves i.e. to be happy and the awareness of the absence of what we want can make us unhappy.

At that point, if some well meaning friend or some Abraham inspired life coach or a positive person comes along and says “all is well”, all we want to say is “yes, sure, come and see my life and you will know that all is NOT well”. Then he/she says “you need to feel happy in order to get things which make you more happy” and you are like “who is telling you all this nonsense?” Then she/he says “Life is good” and you find yourself rolling your eyes saying “which world do you live in?”…and so on…you get the point I am trying to make?

When you are feeling low, what you want to so desperately want is to feel good but often it’s too much of a stretch considering where you are (and how long you have been in that low feeling state). This is not the time for you to jump into a state of bliss (even if that is what you want). Instead what you could do is try and feel a “little bit” better. That’s all. Trying to go from a feeling of anger to a feeling of optimism is a slow process. After all you did not go from feeling good to feeling anger in one day so coming back to feeling good usually will also take time. It’s an incremental process.

In times like this, distraction helps a lot. Distraction has power and the suggestion is to distract yourself in the few moments during the day when you are feeling a little relief from your pain (emotional or physical or both). So for example, if you have a painful illness or that you are experiencing the pain of being betrayed by your life partner or that you finances are not what you would want them to be or your career is not going the way you want – it could be any of these or something else wherein you are feeling pain. You need to be aware of the moments as the day goes wherein the pain lessens a little bit and you need to catch those moments and distract yourself to something which is easy to appreciate for you (it could be a beautiful holiday you took with your parents in your childhood or that recognition you got in your office or your child’s smile, petting your pet etc). The need is to stretch that moment of relief to as much as you can. As you consistently and consciously do this on an everyday basis, you will find yourself experiencing more of what you want to feel. At a stage wherein you are feeling stronger, then you can come back to the topic/subject of pain for you and find something to appreciate in that also.

The question can arise as to why do you need to find something to appreciate in what has given you pain?

Well, you can continue to feel low, be sarcastic, be defensive, be cynical, harbor hatred, be envious etc but till the time you make peace with the subject that you feel so much pain in, you will find a pattern occurring in your life. The people could be different, the situations could be different, the experiences could be different but the pain would be same. You can continue to feel low/angry/envy/sarcasm etc but the law of attraction will bring you experiences which match your feelings and therefore, you will continue to feel the same. The law of attraction states “like attracts like”. What one is feeling attracts more to feel the same. i.e. if one is feeling good, more experiences manifest which make the person feel even more good and if one is feeling negative, more experiences manifest which make the person feel even more negative.

What you want to feel is not negative emotion but it is joy, freedom, empowerment, love, appreciation, optimism and in order for you to feel what you want, you will have to change your feelings before the experiences can change in your life. Once you make peace with that particular topic (it could be freedom, money, abundance, relationships, marriage, children, parents, death etc), you change your feelings about that topic and then the universe gives you more experiences which match your new vibration.

You make peace with that topic which caused you pain by deliberately finding things to appreciate in and around it. It does look like an effort initially but since you have taken out the time and made the effort of distracting yourself consistently, chances are high that you will be strong enough to find something to appreciate in that specific topic which you found painful. Incase you still feel that you are not strong enough to appreciate the painful topic, you may like to give yourself more time and continue distracting yourself and creating better feeling moments. You may consider anger release and forgiveness exercises which resonate with you.

Once you are feeling strong, you can make “lists of appreciation” around that particular topic which caused you pain. You can focus on what came out of that pain and the lessons you learn’t because of it. You will be writing a new story of that pain. The lists can also be full of appreciation for other things in your life which are going the way you want them to go. If you can appreciate many times during a day, you will create “pockets of appreciation” throughout the day for yourself. When you will be in these pockets of appreciation, you will feel relief from the pain, feel better and most important you would have changed your vibration around that topic. The next time you focus on that topic, you will feel a much more positive vibration.

As you deliberately start creating moments in which you feel better on an everyday basis, you will soon find the experiences in your life changing to match upto your new feelings. Initially, you may find small things working out for you like three green traffic lights in a row or meeting a friend you like and had been thinking about for sometime. We call these coincidences but there is nothing like co-incidence. We “co”-create what we then call “co”-incidences. A lot of times, we co create unconsciously i.e. by default. The process described above will help in co creating consciously and when you know “how to” create the experiences you want, you can always replicate the process for anything that you want.

As you notice these wonderful experiences happening in your life and are able to correlate them to what you are doing consciously and deliberately on a daily basis, you will feel motivated to carry on this path and then you will slowly realise the powerful creator that you are. From this place of strength, it will be easier for your desires to manifest in your reality. You will then stop living life reactively and start living it proactively and people around you who are looking at your life will call you “lucky”, little knowing that now you are the “deliberate creator” you always intended to be.

It’s crucial to change what we are offering vibrationally to the universe in order to change the manifestations (or reality) in our lives and the best thing is that “we can” change our vibrations, if we want to. To quote Abraham again –

“And here’s the most important thing that we want you to hear about that: Because you moved to a different vibrational vantage point, the manifestational evidence has to shift, too. So, in the moment that you make the effort to do that, all things in the universe regarding that subject respond to the new vibration that you’re offering.

So, that’s the day you get an idea that pays off to you. That’s the day you rendezvous with somebody who has something to offer you- and you have something to offer them- and you exchange something financially, as a result of it. In other words, that little bit of effort- you couldn’t see it because its not like driving a car toward a destination, but you felt it, so you knew it: and because you felt it, you kept it up, and you kept it up, and you kept it up, and you kept it up….and pretty soon you don’t just hope that you’ll have abundance- you don’t just believe it- you know it, because the evidence is so emphatically surrounding you.

Just thought by thought by thought by thought by thought by thought by thought, you clean it up, clean it up, clean it up, clean it up. What do we mean by “clean it up”? You tell the way you want it to be, and tell less the way you don’t want it to be. You stop facing reality and you start creating reality.”

– Abraham (Money and Law of attraction – learning to attract wealth, health and happiness by Esther and Jerry Hicks, The teachings of Abraham)

Let it go for the ease letting go brings to you

flower floating - Marcus Dall Col

 

“As I walked out of the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison. “

– Nelson Mandela

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Photo credit – Marcus Dall Col via unsplash.com

You have a choice

two women with V sign - Ian Scheider

“If you see friends who are experiencing illness, try to imagine them well. Notice that when you focus upon their illness, you feel bad; but when you focus upon their possible recovery, you feel good.”

– Abraham
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The way you focus on the situation makes a difference to the way you feel about it and the way you feel about it, attracts more to feel the same according to the law of attraction. It’s the energy you are sending out there. The best part is that you have complete control over the way you focus.

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Photo credit – Ian Schneider via unsplash.com

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